Everything is arbitrary

We recently had the University website redesigned by an advertising agency. One of the requirements was that the site must conform to Priority 1 World Wide Web Consortium Web Content Accessibility Guidelines at a minimum, and that it should also conform to Priorty 2, preferably Priority 3.

On delivery I noticed they had a green box with white text. The green was mottled and graduated and became yellow in places. It was obvious to me, with my reasonably good eyesight, that white text is not easy to read when on a yellow-ish background (it doesn't really take a genius or a blind-man to figure that one out now, does it?). So the Marketing team sent the image back to the agency and requested a new one.

The new one was much better. I could definitely read it. Just to be sure I ran the colours through an online colour contrast analyser. The difference in colour and brightness was still not quite enough to meet the Priority 2 WCAG checkpoint 2.2 regarding colour contrast. However, it was pretty close so I left it up to the Marketing team to determine whether they were happy with it.

They weren't.

The agency sent another image along with the following comment:

"The algorithms are a useful guide to ensuring sufficient contrast and colour difference, but the precise thresholds are somewhat arbitrarily chosen (strange that the human eye works in such neat numbers, 125 and 500 ;)"

Isn't this a bit like saying:

"Hmm, it's a bit strange that water just happens to boil at exactly 100°C, isn't it?"

or

"How perculiar that 1 Litre of water weighs exactly 1 kilogram."

or

"Strange, don't you think, that a day is exactly 24 hours long?"

Well, I've got news for you Mr Smarty-pants-Multi-media-degree-don't-you-know-Ad-agency-man, a day isn't exactly 24 hours long. We make it that long so that it's easy to measure. Water only boils at 100°C because we decided that would be a good way of measuring temperature. Time is arbitrary, everything humans measure with is arbitrary. Don't you think perhaps they decided that 125 and 500 were nice, round, easy numbers to remember and developed algorithms accordingly? Dear me...

Grammar Nazi: Gil Mayo corrects "would of"

One of the reasons I like Gil Mayo (The Gil Mayo Mysteries, ABC1, Thursdays 8.35pm) is that he is a stickler for grammatical correctness. The show doesn't contain much "laugh out loud" material and is at times a bit weird and contrived, but occasionally it hits the right spot and extracts more than a mere chuckle from me.

A classic scene was when Kite, the Welshman, was asking for a code and the others kept asking "a cord?" until he put on his poshest English accent and pronounced code with a long vowel. It's a phonetic joke and hard to transcribe onto paper (or blog) but suffice to say, having experienced a similar encounter myself when ordering a vodka and coke in a London bar ("a cork? What, like just a vodka and er.. a cork?"), which resulted in me also having to adopt my best posh English accent, this scene certainly had me laughing out loud.

Another scene I chortled away at occurred last night and went a little something like this:

Neil, the accountant: I was afraid he'd lose his job.
Clair, the bar owner: Well, he would of.
Gil, the grammar nazi: Have.

Miscellaneous conversation follows, then:

Clair: I resent the implication that he would of.
Gil: Have.

Refer to my previous post, Should have, should've, should of to see just why this tickled me.

Grammar Nazi: The Importance of Order

Read the following paragraph from the BBC News website:

Mr Rudd issued his landmark apology for the abuse and discrimination the country's indigenous people have endured since European colonisation in February, soon after taking office.

The order of the wording implies that the European colonisation of Australia occurred in February. Colonisation occurred over two hundred years ago; Rudd's apology was made in February. This is a surprising grammatical, or rather semantic, error from an institution such as the BBC. The paragraph should have been worded:

In February, soon after taking office, Mr Rudd issued his landmark apology for the abuse and discrimination the country's indigenous people have endured since European colonisation.

What a massive difference to meaning is made by the order in which those few words appear in the sentence.

World Youth Day

Crowds at the official opening of World Youth Day. From: www.news.com.au

Had anyone reading this blog heard of World Youth Day before about a month ago? Have the British residents amongst you heard of it at all? I don't know whether I've been sleeping under a rock for the last 32 years or whether an almighty fuss is suddenly being made of it in Australia right now but I hadn't a clue what it was until a few weeks back.

For those of you who are still clueless, it's a massive meeting of young Catholics. It happens about once every three years and it's an international event. Despite the name, "World Youth Day", it actually happens over about five days. (I always was sceptical about the story of creation happening in seven days and now I suspect it was actually thirty-five, which is still quite impressive.)

Basically hundreds of thousands of these young Catholics congregate on a city (in this case Sydney) and party and pray for a few days. That seems like such a strange combination of words to place in one sentence: Catholics, party, pray.

I will probably be flamed for this but I am astounded at the number of enthusiastic young devotees being portrayed on the news (every day). I always thought of Catholicism as the kind of religion that kids were dragged into (often literally and hungover) and given names like Mary and Bernadette and Joseph, because their parents were Catholics and their parents' parents were Catholic and no one ever questioned it. Most of the Catholics I have known stopped practising as soon as they left home, and have felt forever guilty about it, and everything else for that matter. It seems like such an old-fashioned religion somehow and I suppose I imagine young folk getting more into the relatively modern protestant denominations of Christianity, such as Pentecostalism (HillSong certainly seems popular in Australia) or not bothering at all.

World Youth Day is expecting 125,000 international visitors. The opening mass at Darling Harbour yesterday attracted over 150,000 pilgrims and the papal mass on Sunday is expected to address a congregation of half a million. According to the World Youth Day website it is the biggest event Australia has ever hosted, attracting more overseas visitors than even the Sydney Olympics in 2000 and providing Pope Benedict XVI's first ever visit to Australia. The television coverage is greater than the Tour de France and the Olympics combined, although I suppose there isn't too much to report on the Olympics at this stage. Still, I am finding the extent of the coverage of an event I had never even heard of before quite bizarre. Images flash on the screen of young people wearing their national colours and World Youth Day t-shirts shouting, singing, being generally rowdy and happy, fireworks and pop concerts, not the sort of things I ever associated with the stuffy old Roman Catholics.

It's all been a bit of an education to me really. Catholicism can be cool (in a Guy Sebastian kind of a way) and Catholic kids know how to party (as long as it all wraps up by 10pm and involves a few prayers here and there). Sydney must be a crazy place right now.

Oh, and just for the record, I think priests should be allowed to be gay. Unless they're Catholic, in which case they can be gay but celibate, merely because Roman Catholic priestly sex is against the rules.

One last thing, as we're on the subject of religion, isn't this a brilliant headline:

Mormons make missionary position clear

I love it! The best thing is, it's about young (male) mormon missionaries posing semi-naked for a calendar. Brilliant.